When Writing About Suicide or Mental Illness or Addiction

I stumbled on an excellent article from aportiaadamsadventure.wordpress.com in which the author discusses college training for journalists on handling a suicide story. The author is applying that learning to her fiction.

Below are a few excerpts from the article. You may read the complete entry here: http://aportiaadamsadventure.wordpress.com/2013/01/12/writing-about-suicide/#comment-520

An article from the Poynter Institute written a decade ago remains one of the best on the subject if you are interested in reading more, but this is the quote that I always keep in mind when this subject comes up (which thankfully, is not that often, but still happens more than it should):

Mental illness is almost always present in a case of suicide. To report on suicide without discussing the role of mental illness is like reporting on a tornado without mentioning the underlying weather conditions. Tornados don’t whip up out of nowhere, and neither does suicide.

***

Just because context helps when writing, Statistics Canada and Health Canada obviously follow this subject very closely, and their latest numbers are:

Suicide is a major cause of premature and preventable death. It is estimated, that in 2009 alone, there were about 100,000 years of potential life lost to Canadians under the age of 75 as a result of suicides.

Research shows that mental illness is the most important risk factor for suicide; and that more than 90% of people who commit suicide have a mental or addictive disorder.^1,2 Depression is the most common illness among those who die from suicide, with approximately 60% suffering from this condition.

***

The article writer is working on a fictional story set in the 1930’s. She asks readers for input about mental health support and treatment from the time. I reply to her request as follows:

Excellent article! You ask for insight from the 30’s. I’ll share a personal anecdote. I learned in my fifties about my maternal grandfather’s commitment to an insane asylum. I learned it by finding personal papers of my mother’s that referenced the event. My mother had them stashed away. Never in my entire lifetime had my mother told that story to me. Instead she had painted a picture for me of a talented man who was ahead of his time. From the same stash of papers, I learned my grandfather physically abused my grandmother. The societal code of the time was silence about anything untoward, especially if the family had any social prominence. So much so that long after my grandfather was dead, long after I was a married adult and a mother, my mother never mentioned the dark side or mental illness of my grandfather. I learned about it after my mother left her home, and I was cleaning out the place.

After sending that message, I recalled more about the story of my grandfather. It was set in the Great Depression. He was in the throes of losing the family dairy and farm. His wife died, leaving him to care for seven children from age 14 to a newborn infant, all while running a home milk delivery business (done from a horse drawn cart) and running a crop and dairy farm. It was in a time when a family grew their own food and preserved it, so a huge garden had to be tended and defended from pests, then harvested and put up. Kids had to get to school, be dressed and fed. The wee ones required care 24/7.

As my grandmother lay dying of cancer, my grandfather or my mother, the oldest child, injected grandmother with morphine to control her pain. I am uncertain about why he did it exactly, but my grandfather began using his wife’s morphine himself and became addicted. In the 1930’s, my grandfather’s addiction was treated as mental illness in the insane asylum. (I’m sure there’s more to the narrative that I will never know.)

All of this tragic story was hidden from me by my mother. She did tell me that after my grandmother’s death, grandfather fell apart and abandoned the farm and the children. She said my grandmother had been the glue that held the family together. After her death, the children tried to operate the farm, but, as children, they failed. Ultimately, in the midst of depression, the children were split up and sent to various homes, where they were grudgingly taken in and resented as another mouth to feed in what were difficult times.

The point is there is always a backstory to suicide. Often it is mental illness or addiction. And there is often a backstory to addiction and mental illness, too. When writing about the subject of suicide, mental illness or addiction, be sure to make the reader aware of the backstory, since it provides context for the current event you are writing about.

Control Freak–Are You One?

If this is a page out of True Confessions, then I confess: I can be a control freak. Being one has merits at times: I tend to complete the tasks that are important to me. I organize my life. Life generally works out well But the down side is I can run off everyone I love in the process.

Shelley Prevost of Inc.com offers eight ways to tell if you are a control freak:

 

• You believe that if someone would change one or two things about themselves, you’d be happier. So you try to “help them” change this behavior by pointing it out, usually over and over.

• You micromanage others to make them fit your (often unrealistic) expectations. You don’t believe in imperfection and you don’t think anyone else should either.

• You judge others’ behavior as right or wrong and passive-aggressively withhold attention until they fall in line with your expectations. Sitting in silent judgment is a master form of control.

• You offer “constructive criticism” as a veiled attempt to advance your own agenda.

• You change who you are or what you believe so that someone will accept you. Instead of just being yourself, you attempt to incept others by managing their impression of you.

• You present worst-case scenarios in an attempt to influence someone away from certain behaviors and toward others. This is also called fear mongering.

• You have a hard time with ambiguity and being OK with not knowing something.

• You intervene on behalf of people by trying to explain or dismiss their behaviors to others

I am not suggesting you change yourself. A leopard can’t change its spots. Rather, I urge you to be aware of yourself so you can temper your behavior when your behavior is riding roughshod over others whom you love. Or work with. Or need to play nice with. Like editors or literary agents or reviewers. Knowing when to rein yourself in is a highly desirable trait.

IMHO, many successful people are control freaks. It is part of a set of characteristics that enable one to rise about average performance. So use the attributes in ways that help you achieve your goals while making the world a better place for someone other than yourself. Thinking that way may help you balance things out–or keep peace in the home, office or social setting.

 

You Can’t Make This Stuff Up

As authors, we are always looking for unique ways to make our stories stand out. One way to achieve that is to weave weird facts into the story line. Here are a couple to show you what I mean.

First, persons with a go-getter personality — dominated by ambition, logic and decisiveness — are likely to have a ring finger that is longer than his or her index finger. Why? The long fourth finger is an indication that this person was exposed to a higher than average amount of testosterone en utero, according to author Dr. John T. Manning of Rutgers University. He covers the subject in his book Digit Ratio.

Second, women change their taste in men based on their hormone levels. Researcher Tony Little found that women taking birth control pills tend to choose men with pronounced masculine features. The manly traits indicate a higher testosterone level, which is also linked to aggressive behavior and a higher than average likelihood of divorce.

Finally, an adrenaline rush can make the sparks fly between partners. Research by Arthur Aron and Donald Dutton prove it. They found doing something daring together increases the odds of bonding with your date. In one study, male subjects were asked to cross either a shaky or sturdy bridge to speak to an attractive female “researcher”  who provided the male subject her phone number. Those men who met the female after the shaky bridge crossing were more likely to follow-up with a phone call and an invitation to go out together. The exhilaration of being in a risky situation together increases attraction.

Who knew?